I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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