I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize