Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
The adults are the big ones right?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize