I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
