I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
