btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
be right there i have to get my cape
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
