You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
