i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
