How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
your like the ambassador to my penis.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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