I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I enjoy the company of your penis
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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