Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
