I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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