i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
