those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
