Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
