I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
