yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize