It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
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