I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
