peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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