And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
