No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
