Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Randomize
