I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
