it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
