Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
