But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
