I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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