your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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