therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
