So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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