And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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