Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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