my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
