so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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