So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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