She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
