that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Randomize
