no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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