its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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