Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
my poor anus
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
