carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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