Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
