Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
