you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
