i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
