if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
