We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
