Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize