I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
