I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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